1/30/08

The Ideal Mommy World

If I ruled the world:

1. Pram Parking would be universal. Every car with a baby & stroller could park nearest the entrance. The Australians figured this out, what's wrong with the rest of the world?
2. Daddy's would have three day weekends, every weekend.
3. Personal Drivers. The day we give birth a personal driver takes the helm of our minivan. Because let's face it, how many times have you put your knee on the wheel while pumping breast milk with one hand and reaching for a dropped sippy cup with the other? Those "Baby On Board" signs should read, "Mommy Driving: BEWARE".
4. School holidays would never coincide with other closures. Why is it that the library, the zoo and gymnastics are closed the same week that the preschool closes? Are they trying to send me to the nuthouse?
5. Stay-At-Home Mom Title would be forever changed to "Ruler of Your World" so that everyone was clear with my job description. Occupation? "Ruler of Your World" But why do I have to go to bed, mommy? "Because I'm the Ruler of Your World."
6. All children would have an emergency OFF switch for those moments when they just need to stop....screaming, crying, being awake, etc.
5. Drive Through Everythings. I've said it before, I'll say it again. Parents with children in their car should not be forced to get out at every friggin stop. It is torture. Drive through groceries, drive through hair cuts, drive through shoe stores....
Any additions? Please address to "Ruler of Your World"

1 comment:

jo said...

AMEN SISTER!!! From, Another Ruler of Your World!