Legoland in Review

"How Big IS this place?" John gawked as we weaved our way towards the Legoland entrance. Before I could speak, we rounded the bend to a parking lot the size of Zimbabwe. His jaw dropped (and it wasn't in excitement).
I unfolded the enormous map and pointed to the colorfully printed chaos, "This big. I guess it's like Disneyland."
Unlike our family trip to Disneyland, I did not obsess over this outing; no late night internet research, no websites, no blogging, just ticket prices for our vacation budget.
We unloaded the kids and John looked around at the neighboring throngs of glitzy SoCal moms and their kids.
"Is this what stay-at-home moms do with their kids in San Diego?" he asked me, as though I were the State Authority on Stay-At-Home-Mom activities throughout California.
It was true, there wasn't a dad in sight, and every mom wore jeweled Italian sandals and a Coach purse.
Then he glanced back at the map and announced, in a not so enthusiastic tone, "I was not mentally prepared for this."
(John later admitted to a misinformed vision of Legoland which included a bowling alley-sized room full of legos and a hot dog stand)
Our first ride was a 30 minute wait for the Coastersaurus. We happily made our exit after the 27 second coaster ride and hop-skipped down the path towards John and Ana when Shelby bit the dust. She came up bloody and bruised and limped along with a swollen, skinned knee.
This is exactly where things made a turn for the worse. She cried through lunch, shied away from half the rides we suggested, and whimpered through the entire afternoon. Then she peed her pants when we FINALLY made it to the front of the mechanical horse ride. We changed her clothes and continued on a death march toward the exit, stopping in Pharaoh Land for a mini airplane ride and a walk through the netted jungle gym where John hit his head so badly he punctured a hole in his scalp.
Are you getting the picture?
This family was not impressed. We arrived on Veteran's Day and the crowds were thick enough to clog lines, but not walking paths. For $120 (we had a free ticket coupon) we suffered two injuries, a pee in public embarrassment, and a $13 face paint that rubbed off on my new t-shirt. Ana was big enough to ride on one attraction. John and I lamented about the lack of music and overwhelming sounds of crying children. The atmosphere lacked excitement and the rides were reminiscent of a flashier Mid-State Fair. Even some of the employees smelled and looked like carnies (Marlboro Reds and missing teeth).
Legoland did have its perks: The Marketplace near the entrance/exit has yogurts and cups of dry cereal, espressos and fruit smoothies, cool looking water play and rides for a day devoid of clouds and wind (I said looking because we did not participate due to weather), and a nice First Aid station.
I think we'll stick to Sea World next time we visit San Diego.

1 comment:

JO said...

OH NO!!! I am so sorry that Legoland did not work out for you...I was waiting to hear how much fun you all had so that maybe we would go the next time we were in SD. I hope John and Shelby are OK!