The Scream Team

Now, I know every child screams. But it seems to me I've been graced with a child who possesses improved lung capacity and an Opera-sized larynx. In the wee hours of the morning, I awoke to Ana's deafening shrieks from her crib. When I arrived at her crib I realized her HUGGIES diaper (I'm not expecting further endorsement from this company, nor will they receive my money) had leaked all over her crib. Screaming was a valid reaction to waking up in a puddle of pee, I'll give her that. But as I wrestled a clean diaper on her and slid a temporary cover over the wet spot, she became further enraged to the point that neighbors (if we had any) should be calling 911. Something is seriously wrong in that house.
At this point you're saying to yourself, okay, okay, we get it! Your kid screams loud.
And maybe, at this point, you're right. But the fifteen minutes I spent trying to calm her down, attempting to shush the quiet into her, fleeing from room to room as she relentlessly awakened every member in our household with a determined red-faced whole body scream told me this might be a unique situation requiring future therapy. This was a really, really MAD scream. And it was really, really 2:37 A.M.
Now that Shelby had come running into our bed mumbling "Daddy, it's too loud" and I watched as they simultaneously pulled the covers up over their heads. Even the dog sought solace in the farthest room from the noise, the back bathroom...her head shoved under the toilet. As Ana began to slow to a regular "AUUUGGHHHHH!" quiet quiet quiet "AAUUUUUUGGHHHH!!", just when I thought we were making progress the hiccups began.
"AAAAUUUUGGHHH!" quiet, quiet, hiccup, quiet, "AAUUUGGHHHH!" quiet, quiet, hiccup, quiet...it went on like this for what seemed like an eternity. How did I get stuck with this job, isn't my usual post the quilty parent curled up in bed whilst my patient husband shushes the children to sleep? Her little body shook with rage one minute and then suddenly went limp as she dropped into deep sleep. And then just as suddenly, she erupted in a fit of rage.
And when the screaming died down and her tiny body succumbed to sleep, I tip-toed around the house, returning the sleeping to their rightful places until I finally fell back into my side of the bed.
John rolled over and whispered, "You know, we may have a long future in anger management with her."
You said it.

Comments