I recently received a novel sized packet from my daughter's school PTA. There was the 14 page informational, the fees, the request for donation, and then a request to sponsor another member. (Redundant me thinks)
Then the giant glossy magazine for fundraising and the nineteen sheets of incentive coupons and reports of fundraising success. An entire hour later, I emerged a more educated parent, with far fewer dollars in her pocket, a mountain of guilt on her shoulders and ink on her hands.
And just when I thought I was done, I came across the three scholastic book orders.
All said and done, I had written exactly SEVEN CHECKS. Totalling $163.74.
Then, I penciled in my volunteer schedule for working in Shelby's kindergarten room. Of course, I would have to pay the sitter to watch Ana while I was away. Another $96 a month. This public education was getting expensive. Not to mention unnerving!
Since school began a few weeks ago, I have spouted every detail of my family history, my child's health and wellness, her medical records, dental records, our insurance information, I might as well give up the details of my sex life while I'm at it to the school secretary. She better know we're practicing healthy safe sex in our household of four Caucasians with upper level college education and a history of heart failure and no food allergies. I'm pretty sure the government is now tracking us with a homing device.
Hey PTA, I'm right over here...

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